Second Fricking Puberty!!
Did you know that when you hit 30 your body goes through a second puberty?! Yeah, neither did I until it happened. I promise you it's a real thing... all of a sudden your clothes no longer fit [not because of weight gain, oh no, your hips actually just got wider]. Doesn't matter if you're a woman wanting to procreate or not, mother nature makes sure you're prepared 'just in case'. What about the men? Metabolism - gone. Peace out. See you later suckers! Long gone are the days of cheeky snacks and late night beers without consequence, you literally can just smell the chocolate cake and ta-da! that's an extra 3lbs you won't be able to shift.
There are some perks - boobs! Didn't get them the first time round ladies? Now you're spilling out of your A cup - that's how most of us figure out that something's amiss I suspect. That fear factor of "why are my boobs bigger for no reason?... or is there a reason? what the heck is the reason?" The rush to the pharmacy to make sure it's not THAT reason, even though you know there's a 99.9% chance not. So why did our educators/physicians fail to tell us about this second coming of age? Because they were probably still scarred from their own transitions and didn't want the rest of us to freak out too. There's no way to prepare for it, so we may as all go into this blind. I mean that's truly adulthood right there - we're all faking it until we make it!
What can you expect?
1. Weight gain - inexplicable undeniable weight gain. [you might as well eat the treat, you're gonna gain weight regardless haha]
2. Lines/creases and wrinkles - you wish you'd listened to your mom about that factor 50 for your face now.
3. 10.30pm what's that? Making it past 9.30pm is an actual struggle, you're on the slow transition to actually wanting to go to bed early to get up at some obscure hour the next morning. Let's be real here, even if you wanted to stay up late/sleep in, your body clock says otherwise.
4. Hair. Places where you never anticipated - nostrils are small forests; Ear holes/lobes [yes that's a thing] are tiny caverns of fluff; body hair for everyone!
5. This one's for my ladies - hips widening. I literally had to donate 6 pairs of perfectly good jeans I had owned for 10+ years because they no longer went over my hips *sob*. I hadn't even gained weight, my bones changed! No amount of exercise can help with that.
So what next? HAVE FUN! These changes are going to happen regardless so you might as well embrace your new body and enjoy life. Stay healthy, exercise and be the best version of the new you that you can!
Whether you're waiting it out, or already going through 'the second coming', I found this hilarious video on Buzzfeed to brighten your day. Click HERE to view.